I wish people cared more about how others are doing in life

Life is hard. It almost feels like you can't make it in this world alone. Of course there are the moments when life is really easy and you forget how hard life can be but trust me, hard times will come! Anyway thats not my point. You know how we ask people 'How are you?' when we see them. Who wants to hear any answer to it that a basic positive answer such as 'I'm fine' or 'oh, I'm ok and you?'. Since we don't expect to hear anything but a 'I'm fine', that fine could mean a tonne of things. Imagine asking a person you don't know that well, how are they doing and they explained their worries to you. Honestly, how awkward would that be... I guess it would be nice to be there to listen to them but it's just unexpected. 

I thought about this because my cousin asked me 'How are you managing to wake up from your bed in the mornings now a days?' and I thought, that is an amazing way to ask someone indirectly without intruding is everything okay. And since its not just a normal question like how are you, it makes you actually think about it... how am I really? I thought it would be nice to hear someone ask me more often, hey how are you really? So yea, I guess especially with close people I will start asking how they are in a bit different ways than just hey 'how's u?' and show that I care. =)

I wish I NEVER have to talk anyone out of suicide again.

I have mentioned in this blog about loving helping people out and I even put a photo up that said 'talking someone out of suicide.' Lets just say that that 'sorta wish' came true, unfortunately. It was NOT fun. I felt such responsibility and I felt like if that person took their own life, it was my fault. I would have done anything to get out of that situation. I didn't know to do honestly. I just talked and listened and talked and gave advice and told what not to do etc. I kept thinking, should I be calling an ambulance? Should I call their friends? Should I call the police? It was so... distressing. 

I talked with the person for hours at night online even tho I had to wake up really early for work. Every now and then it felt like the person just wanted attention and was making a too big deal about everything, and then it felt like they were fo real again. The next day was absolutely horrible. I didn't know if the person was alive and I felt so so so so so bad. I was in my own world constantly thinking about it and I was extremely stressed out. Words cannot express how I felt. Seriously, NEVER again. 

I found out after a few days that the person was alright but in the hospital and I was sooooo thankful. Seriously thank God for everything being okay. Of course if I get into a situation like this one again, I will stay and help out and listen and try talk the person out of suicide, I mean how couldn't I? But if I could pick then I preferably wouldn't. 

I wish I more often witnessed people get over the dark sides/challenges of life

When you know someone and you see that their going through a rough patch in life, you're involved automatically. I have a friend who has been going through a tough time for quite a while and I've thought about her so much. At least for me its a bit self-evident that I try be as a support and try lift people up once they fall. Now here comes the point: Oh the joy when you see or hear that someone you've watched be in this dark place for ages is finally coming to the light again. It feels like there was a battle that has now been won! 

In a way its a victory for me as well because in some situations I feel like I am mentally with the person a lot, and I try fight through those battles with the person. It sure is an amazing feeling when you realize they are free or almost there! After that, all you have to do is make sure they stay up and when you fall, then perhaps someone can help you up. We can't really make it in this world alone can we?

I Wish I Felt More Comfortable Smiling

I have always thought that I can't smile showing my teeth cuz i think it looks stupid when I do so. I just smile like :) When I went to model school I got forced to smile showing my teeth and it was... not nice, I felt really awkward as the guy took photos of me. Anyways, recently I have started not minding that much. I've even allowed a few people to take a few photos of me smiling like =D and I gotta admit they weren't bad at all. So I hope I get over that completely and start feeling comfortable with my smile.

Someone once told me never to say a smile is ugly or say anything negative about someones smile no matter how weird it may look, cuz a smile is beautiful. And I agree with that guy, at least now I do! A true smile is the most beautiful thing ever. Personally I have always thought that the best photos of me are the ones where I look sad, but I'm glad that I'm starting to like the happy ones too! C'moon just look at the two photos here, which one would you rather see?