I wish I was out in the rain right now.

My ideal place to be right now: outside, in rain thats not freezing, dark/gray-ish weather, and not near too many people. I wanna have a walk around right now in the cool rain. Rain is so peaceful. I love rain. I just have so much on my mind and just want to be alone for a bit. Everything about rain is refreshing. The smell, the touch, the look of it. Its so fresh and gets your mind off everything. I wouldn't mind taking a walk for like 30 minutes and come home soaked. I think I would feel so much better in all ways after that and just be ready for a good night sleep after that.

I wish I wasn't scared to donate blood.

I really wanna donate blood but I'm just not comfortable with the idea. I'm not scared of needles or seeing blood but I just feel uncomfortable. My blood group is O- which is the most precious one because I can donate to any other blood group so I feel like I have some sort of responsibility to donate. Oh, the contradiction of wanting to do something but being too scared. I just hate the feeling of someone taking blood from me, something being taken from my arm constantly and I feel the flow. If it was a few second thing I'd be fine since I can kinda hold my breath and force myself to think about pancakes or something, but this will take quite a while. Oh gosh. =( I will one day force myself to do it tho. Thats a promise. Theres an opportunity to donate at my university on the 28th so I will try get myself mentally prepared for this. Most likely won't happen but I'll try my very best not wuss out. I have that nervous feeling in me already, the same one I get when I go to the dentist or something else thats horrible. Wish me luck with this...